Flabby belly, Ceasar scars, big belly, big boobs, small boobs, wide hips...the list goes on. We all have body bits that we wish were better. And what is regarded as 'a problem' is completely different for everyone. But it's really not the bits that bite us, it's our mindset.
A halter swimsuit is very flattering on those with a big bust. This one with ruching is terrific for a troublesome tummy. And it's all true, they will help to fine tune your bits, but there is so much more to this. So much more.
People ask me what I do and I say what I think is the most obvious and easiest to understand. "I sell swim and resortwear for women 35+ and I do it online". Fabulous. A knowing nod usually then follows on so I'm sure it's been understood but I don't see anyone get a twinkle in their eye. It's more of a 'that's nice dear' response. I want more and it's my fault for assuming I know what they will want to hear.
I wanted more because I know that what I do makes a difference to women. It's not just about selling swimwear and holidaywear here at Sequins and Sand. It's more, lots more.
How do I know there's more? Because every week they tell me. Every, single, week women send us emails or drop us a message on facebook to tell us and that's why I do what I do and why Sequins and Sand exists. It's that more that gives me tingles and purpose.
See, swimwear is merely the medium. What we are really in the business of is Confidence. If I could sell it in a tub, tube, bottle, goonie, freight container, I would. Not to make a buck, but because every woman has the right and should, feel confident in herself. But we all know, deep inside, that we don't always feel that way. For some, sadly, rarely.
Confidence really is everything. And I need to take my own shot every now and then too. The confidence to write this post and get over myself and just do it has been gurgling away inside me for literally years! "What if what I have to say is not worthy?" "The last thing I want to do is create more noise in the busy lives of my customers". "Their time is precious and it should be spent on doing things that matter." The voices, the excuses just keep on coming.
But then it finally happened on the weekend whilst consuming another edition of renegade Collective magazine. I reached the point where I didn't want to carry on this way any more. I wanted to pop that cork of self doubt and just let it go. More than anything, so that I could move on. What is the point of holding back and just circling, like a plane, waiting for permission from the control tower to land. If there is just one person out there who is spurred on to take that same step after reading this, then it's been very worth it.
The point is, there really is no perfect time and the permission you ultimately need is from yourself, not someone else. There are always going to be voices in your head saying you can't. Because of this, because of that. At some point you have to pop that cork and just get on with it.
When it's hot you cool off in a pool or the sea and in a soothing breeze. For a great way to relax and exercise, swim. On your precious summer break with your family and/or friends, it's inevitable that you'll be poolside or on the beach, so a swimsuit will come into it at some point. Why deny yourself those pleasures?
I get wonderful emails from women every week who tell me that they are so glad and proud, that they took the plunge and grabbed a cossie. For some, it's been 20 years or more. For others, it was breaking out of hubby's oversized T-shirt and daggy boardies for the first time since having the kids. The stories are numerous. Each one gives me tingles, each one very real.
You are not alone.
If you haven't been in bathers for years, then make a start. Pop your cork and dive in. Start out slowly and in the comfort of your own back yard or bathroom for a while if you like. But please, just make a start. In the words of Melissa and her fabulous blog Suger Coat It, "So swim, for goodness sake. Live. Forget the bullshit."
Good luck girls. Let's do it together, for eachother but more importantly, do it for you.
Sequins and Sand